I love having a blog again.
So yesterday a good friend dropped by to offer a 10 minute massage to me and a couple friends. We got to chatting, and he mentioned he’s been doing own-body sexual yoga1 the past few days, and that it’s been great for him. He said he feels stronger, and he definitely seemed more relaxed.
So this morning I tried it for the first time in months, and sure enough, it was calming and pleasureable. I felt happy, confident, like I don’t desperately and urgently NEEEEEED someone or something else to make me feel complete. I was trying to think yesterday why I don’t do this practice more often, and I realized that for one thing, it’s not something that makes me feel hyped up in an addictive way. It’s not like taking a hit of crack cocaine, or trying to get a “hit” of good feeling from interacting with a woman.
Which brings us to today’s BOT quote from Mantak Chia and Michael Winn:
I’m a lawyer from New York. Taoist cultivation of sexual energy has brought a revolutionary change in my life….
I sensed that sex-love relationships were so perishable because men and women didn’t know how to nourish the life flame between them. I realize that even when I had been a superb lover, at the end of the act I always felt insufficient…
After about 1 1/2 years, I can see that there are no limits to this practice. It has grown more and more pleasurable, and has deeply changed my relations with women.2
I attribute much of the historic repression of women to man’s fear of women’s sexual potency. There is no way he can match her unless he learns to control his seed.3
- First off, do you notice how this quote makes it sound like doing this technique will solve all your problems and make you happy forever? As Adi Da has often remarked, this is a common trait of Basket of Tolerance materials, which is why He recommends studying them with others – other people and other BOT materials, and ideally, His own commentaries – so as not to get fixated on any one point of view or “search”.
- What do you think of the comment about men’s traditional repression of women?
- Whether one is male or female, if we feel we desperately NEED someone else to make us complete, could that cause problems?
- If we feel we need someone else, and they don’t behave how we want, could that lead to anger, sorrow, manipulation, games, bad decisions, infidelity, adultery, physical abuse, sex addiction, single mothers, hatred, aggression, war?
- If you’ve experimented with own-body sexual yoga, how was it?
- When someone is attractive, but he or she is hell-bent on getting attention from the opposite sex all the time, is that truly beautiful? What is beauty?
- Own-body sexual yoga is a term coined by Adi Da Samraj, which describes a practice of “yogic masturbation”, similar to Taoist self-cultivation (but described in a way that has been much more helpful to me personally), wherein orgasm is converted into a regenerative experience, rather than a degenerative one. There’s absolutely ZERO fantasizing, and you radiate from your heart and relax during the whole thing. The book The Complete Yoga of Human Emotional-Sexual Life mentions this I believe. ↩
- Although this person speaks of “relations with women”, his teacher Mantak Chia has suggested that most people looking for pleasure and happiness should confine their sexuality to a relationship with a single person if they want the sexual yoga to actually work (see Sex is not like pizza.) ↩
- Excerpted from Taoist Secrets of Love, by Mantak Chia and Michael Winn (Santa Fe: Aurora Press, 1984). As included in The Basket of Tolerance by Adi Da Samraj. ↩